“Your life does not get better by chance. It gets better by change.” – Jim Rohn
And you know you need to initiate a change in your life when you are filled with a persistent feeling of discontent and unhappiness.
I found myself at that stage in life few years ago.
I was living in Patna, known for its uncouth gentry and its strong casteism. While the former proved to be an obstacle in opening my own store there, the latter wouldn’t let me get a good job locally. On top of that, I was surrounded by toxic relatives who apparently lived to criticize and pull us (Dad & me) down.
I could see only one way out – leave Patna for good. But go where? My sister lived in Delhi, but I couldn’t see Dad or me settling there for good. We both are more of “small town” people. We like to breathe clean air. We like to wake up to the sounds of birds chirping and not to the blaring horns of vehicles. We like to be surrounded by plenty of greens and not a concrete jungle. And we definitely don’t like spending a major portion of our day commuting from one place to another (or stuck at traffic signals)!
So Delhi was definitely out.
When I made a list of possible places where we could relocate to, based on the presence of at least one friend/acquaintance there who could help us in the initial days, I realized I didn’t have that many choices. It was either Nagpur or Patiala or Jaipur. All three were places where we didn’t have any relatives. All three were places where we would have to #StartANewLife from scratch. Not even office colleagues to help you out, you know… that kind of “scratch”.
It was a challenging thought for me, but still seemed possible. Or maybe I was just so fed up with Patna that I felt ready to face this challenge. Not so for Dad though. His mind could simply not adjust around the idea that the two of us move to some place completely new, where we don’t have any relatives to help us settle down. He had never done that sort of thing before.
Eventually, it was our “relatives” in Patna who made the decision for him. Or gave him the “kick”, you can say.
When my sister got married in 2011, they made things so difficult for us at every step of the way that even Dad decided he’d had enough. In fact, the groom’s side didn’t make as much “fuss” as my own relatives did (the ones from Patna)! So critical, so demanding, so negative, and just so toxic!
One month after my sister’s wedding, my Dad and I had moved to Jaipur. It wasn’t a temporary move. This time, we had moved for good. Complete with our bank accounts and everything. It was a big gamble we were taking. We had no idea how we’d fare over here. We didn’t know whether things would get better or worse. All we knew was that we had to make a change.
We dared to #StartANewLife, in a brand new city, and today, we’re living in peace, surrounded by greenery and birds. (See pic above - that's the view from my balcony). We finally bought our own flat here, and I even have my own business now… finally!
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