Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Live Life: Don’t Look For Approval Of Others

One of my previous posts in this NaBloPoMo series got a comment that until and unless one is successful and rich, one is not accepted in the society. That’s what led me to write this post today.
Why exactly is society’s acceptance and approval so important for us anyway? In fact, why is anybody’s approval so important to us? What difference does it make whether or not anybody approves of how we choose to spend our life?

Many of my old friends do not “approve” of my blogging. So should I give up on it then?

Half of my friend list on Facebook hates FarmVille and does not approve of anyone playing that game. So should I let them live my life for me?

I am a Reiki practitioner, and I spend some time daily in energy healing, meditation, chakra balancing etc, whatever takes my fancy that day. And yes… pranayam and a bit of yoga too. More than 95% of my friends and acquaintances are as far removed from all this stuff as can be possible. And yet they accept me in whatever part of our lives we do relate with each other.

I don’t approve of getting drunk every Saturday night simply because it’s “Saturday night”. But a lot of my friends do exactly that! So what? They’re still my friends.

The thing is that if people enjoy your company and if they feel comfortable around you, then they will accept you in whatever little corner of their world you fit in, regardless of who you are, how rich you may be, or what you do.

Besides, does “acceptance by society” mean that you become a clone of the rest of the “inhabitants” of that society?


Look around you… all the famous successful people of the world aren’t those who followed the beaten track! They all did their “own thing”, regardless of what anybody else thought. Many of them are school and college dropouts. Some quit their secure high-paying job and started on their own from scratch. Do you think the “society” approved of them the day they turned their back on a regular handsome salary? I don’t think so.

“Society” isn’t God that we need to be “accepted” by it.

Besides, what exactly is the definition of “society” anyway? We bloggers have our own little blogging society. And then I share another society with my FarmVille neighbors, and yet another one with my Reiki friends.

As far as professional life is concerned, obviously an Interior Designer would be a part of a completely different society than an IT person, or say an executive in a Finance Institution. Why would I try to “fit” into a society of Bollywood actors and actresses when I know I’m not a part of that crowd?

That’s the whole “rat-race” mentality which I mentioned earlier! Everybody wanting the same piece of cheese!


Imagine if all the fingers and thumb of our hand decided one day to become exactly similar to each other! We would have a hand full of five thumbs! Or five middle fingers maybe... 'coz it's the longest!

“Society” exists so we all can get appreciation and recognition for our own special qualities. This concept wasn’t created to “bind” us in anyway.

If you feel you are not “accepted” by a particular society, then maybe it’s not the right place for you to be in. Maybe you should find yourself a different “society”.


This is my 14th post for NaBloPoMo September 2010.

Link to the previous post: Live Life: Follow Your Heart


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12 comments:

Shobhit said...

Exactly... !

For people to be considered successful and admired, they have to stop thinking of being 'acceptable' to the society in the first place.

And I don't mean that people start doing things that are unacceptable (like theft, dacoity, etc.) but just stop letting others decide how they live their lives to be 'accepted' in the 'society'.

And those who just care about pleasing the 'society' around them, don't get anywhere close to being successful.

Swathi Pradeep said...

Lovely post!! I have been in similar situations too and have given a damn about it!!

Raghu V N said...

great post!!! really loved reading this!!!

Shruti said...

to have ones own opinion on life and the courage to live it through is a matter of great strength of self, and society is a very small hindrance that stops us from living life the way we envisage it to be. society is a convenient alibi. When you are clear about what you want, the importance of others' approval starts diminishing.

Kaddu said...

@ Shobhit: Yes, that's exactly what I wanted to convey through my post! :D

Kaddu said...

@ Princess: Swathi, right? I got your comment on the FB page also. He he... how many blogger IDs do you have? :P

Kaddu said...

@ Raghu: Thanks buddy! :D

Kaddu said...

@ Shruti:
"society is a convenient alibi. When you are clear about what you want, the importance of others' approval starts diminishing."

Absolutely true yaar!

BK Chowla, said...

Yes, my dear friend, that was my comment.I still stick to my stand.

Kaddu said...

@ Mr. Chowla: Fair enough... and I stick to mine! :D

UB said...

Oh god Kaddu nice post..Loved reading it. Very much agree with the blogging society thing. Many of my friends don't understand why I blog but that hasn't stopped me from blogging. What a good read.

Kaddu said...

Thanks UB! :D

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